I finally said...My mother is going to Kill me.  Then I thought about how hard my agent, Steve Elzey had been working finding me the right horses to ride. Then all the nice horses I had just worked that I wanted to ride, how long will I be able to hide this pregnancy without anyone finding out and how long would I be able to ride with the nausea.  So many thoughts going thru my mind at once.  What stress.  I wanted to cry but I couldn't, I was just so stunned.  Why Why Why NOW???  I just kept praying to GOD.  Im scared and I don't know what to do.  Please help me.  I had to pull myself together because I had to go to work this morning.  The nausea was just awful.  I was sick to my stomach on top of that.  In my mind I knew this was a Blessing, but it just felt terrible at the time or should I say for the next 3 weeks.  I only told three of my closest friends because I needed to tell someone and I needed positive words and thoughts put in my mind.  Irwin didn't tell anyone.  He knew that if word got out I would lose business.  So for the next 3 weeks I had to put on a brave face and hide how awful I felt from the nausea and the depression that had set in.  I cried almost 2 or 3 times a day.  I love my career, the horses and the people I work with.  I felt like I was letting everyone down including my fans.  I felt ashamed and embarrassed.  Irwin gave me so much support and love thru it all.  I couldn't of got thru it without him.  For about two weeks of forcing myself to go to work when I just wanted to stay in bed and cry all day and from being so sick I finally decided I can't do this to myself or my baby.  I am 38 years old.  This may be my only chance to have a baby and start a family of my own.  I've been riding for almost 19 years, when did I think it was ever going to be the right time? (I don't think I ever was going to think it was going to be the right time.)  So one morning my mind and body finally had enough.  I had 4 horses scheduled to work.  I would work these four and would make my decision to either race today or just stop.  I wanted to see how I would feel. (even though I felt the same everyday for 2 weeks, AWFUL!)  Every horse I got on to work, I put my goggles down and cried walking to and from the track.  I just didn't have the strength and focus anymore to keep racing.  I knew I wasn't being fair to myself, my baby, the owners and trainers that I rode for or my fans who watched me loyally.  It was time to really toughen up and make the right decision no matter how hard it was.  I cried all the way home.  Irwin was there to support me in my decision.  He just let me cry and talk my way thru it.  He never said a word.  I remember thinking of a few female riders that I felt went thru the same thing when they got pregnant.  All I kept saying to Irwin, I need to call Rachal LaVoy(No answer) and then I thought to call Inez Karlson(I let the phone ring twice and hung up.)  I was crying so hard at this point I couldn't think straight.  Irwin finally spoke and said why don't you just take off riding today and get yourself together.  See how you feel later.  If you feel you want to stop then you can decide tomorrow.  And thats what I did.  I finally called my agent Steve and told him that I was pregnant.  To my amazement Steve immediately said Congratulations! (The most important person in Steve's life is his son.  He is the most amazing father)  He said he would call the trainers and get them riders to fill in for me today and to call him later to let him know what my plans were going to be for the rest of the week.  How much longer was I going to be able to ride?  I said thank you for understanding and I would call him later.  I called the Clerk of Scales to tell them that I was sick and I wasn't able to ride today.  Once I made that decision I felt a big weight come off my shoulders.

I cried and slept all day.  I only got up to get something to drink or go to the bathroom.  My body was so exhausted.  But the stress was still there because...(check back tomorrow to get more of my story.)

Rosemary and Irwin Rosendo got the news yesterday that they will be having a baby girl delivered around September 12, 2011.  During the ultra sound the tech asked we would like to know the sex of the baby and we said yes immediately.  She put the probe right between the legs and said its a GIRL.  I started to cry.  Getting pregnant, especially unexpectedly, and having to give up my career and everything that I worked so hard for was really hard.  I never thought that I could get pregnant so I never planned or even thought about it.  When it happened it was a shock.  Irwin was exstatic immediately but it took me awhile to adjust to this new revelation that was happening inside of me.  I found out at 4am on January 21, 2011.  I was feeling kind of nauseaus most of the night (and I had been really overly tired in the previous three weeks but it never occured to me that I could be pregnant.) so I finally decided let me take a pregnancy test real quick. (usually it was all in my head and once I would take a test I would start my menstual cycle within 2 days) I opened the box, took out the stick and pee'ed on it.  In like 30 seconds it said PREGNANT.  I almost fell off the toilet.  I was in such shock I didn't know whether to scream, cry or both.  I slowly got up and walked over to the bed and said "Irwin, Irwin.  No movement.  "IM PREGNANT!"  Irwin jumped out of the bed so fast he almost knocked me over.  He hugged me and said "Oh baby, I can't believe.  Im so happy." Then he realized the state of shock I was in and said "Are you ok?"  I just stood there with a blank stare.  Nothing would come out.  A million thoughts were going thru my mind.  And then I finally said...(Check back tomorrow to get more of my story)

Sorry its been so long since I have last blogged but I have been so busy working that I am to exhausted to write about my day's.  If I blogged every day about how my day went at the races you would just laugh because one day everything goes great and then next day I can't figure out what the hecks going on.  Racing has so many ups and downs it would drive anyone crazy.  But as a Jockey in this business you have to stay focused and humble because everything changes in a minute.(literally)  Last week I rode five races one day and I won 2, two seconds and a third.  Every horse I rode ran great and every race set up perfect.  I was like why can't it be like this everyday.  Today, I worked six horses.  All but two were tough as nails to get to the pole but worked well.  You can't imagine how strong these thoroughbreds are.  I sometime can't believe how strong my hands are to hold them.  This afternoon I have ridden 4 so far and every one of them has drug me around the race track.  Grrr!  But everyday and every horse is different and I am grateful to do what I love.  I have one more race to go and one more chance to win.  So let's go get'em.  Grrrrrrr.....

See you at the races!

This business never stops changing.  When you think your plans are set one direction everything can change as fast as a 6 Furlongs sprint race.(in about a minute and change).  I got an unexpected text message from Agent Steve Elzey about two weeks ago asking me to call him.  I was thinking this must be a mistake.  Steve is one of the best agents in the country.  (His track record with getting his jocks the best mounts and bringing there careers to the top at any given race track.)  I was flattered but not really sure why he wanted me to call him.  Once I spoke to Steve, I was impressed by his demeanor and how he handled his business.  I thought to myself this is the kind of agent I would like to have handle my book for the up coming Tampa Bay Downs meet.  Steve suggested that I come and ride the mini meet at Churchill Downs before heading down to Tampa and I was all for it.  I hadn't ridden at Churchill since 2003 when I rode Supah Blitz in the Kentucky Derby.  I would be competing with the best riding Colony in the country.  Also it was Breeders Cup week.  I was excited, packed and moved within a week from DE to KY.  It was a quick decision and a quick move but it has turned out to be a great transition.  I have won 5 out of 18 starts here putting me fourth in the standings thus far.  I am really excited with my fresh start with an established agent and know that he will bring out the best in my ability to become a better rider.  I ride 6 races today at Churchill Downs.  See you at the races!

This past week has been kind of slow in the win department.  But as a jockey you just have to keep a good positive mental attitude to keep moving forward knowing that the wins will come.  It also helps to have supportive friends and a great mom to help clear away all the negativity that comes. 

I rode Cloudy's Knight at Kentucky Downs last Saturday at Kentucky Downs.   He ran a great race to finish second on a very soft turf course. What an amazing horse.  He has over come so much with class.  He had been off since December 2009.  Jonathan Sheppard really does a great job with this horse.(as he does with all his horses in training!) 

Monday and Tuesday I rode at Delaware Park having some 3rds and 4ths.  Wednesday and Thursday I rode at Laurel Park taking home some 2nds and 3rds.  Im feeling good because all of my horses are really running well but just getting either outrun or coming up a little short.  Yesterday I rode 7 races at Delaware Park and Won 2.  Woohoo!  The feeling is unexplainable when you win a race.  It gives you a rush of energy and boost of confidence.

Today I am riding four races at Monmouth Park.  I was originally named on three but I picked up two more horses and then one of my mounts scratched.  I finished 4th in the first race and now waiting to go ride the other three.  I hope to bring home a winner today.  Wish me luck.  See you at the races!

Life is constantly changing.  You will never know what is right around the corner.  Good or bad, you just have to deal with the cards you are dealt.  Yesterday morning was a day like that.  I got an unexpected phone call early in the morning that brought me emotional stress thru out my day.  But I sucked it up and re-gained my focus everytime I went out on the track to ride my races.  I also had a lot of support from my mom and a few close friends.(you know who you are - Thank you!)  I feel so empowered when sitting on these magnificent thoroughbreds that I get to ride each and every day.  They give me peace and strength all at the same time.  I rode three races with two winners.  One race being the $50,000 Mister Diz Stakes on "Bens Cat"(undefeated 5 for 5) for King Leatherbury.  Winning is such an unexplainable feeling but it made for a perfect ending to my day.  See you at the races!

Once Colonial Downs ended I had plans to fly to Florida for my 20th High School Reunion for the weekend.  It was a lot of fun and it was a nice break to relax.  Monday I started riding at Delaware Park.  I don't really have much business since most of the riders have there established business here.  I am picking up horses here and there and also riding at Penn National and Philadelphia Park.  A lot of traveling and no wins so far.  Kind of frustrating but my horses have been running well just haven't gotten lucky to get to the winner circle yet.  Today, Laurel Park opens its mini meet of 11 days.  I ride 6 races but will be taking off the last race in order to make the $200,000 Governors Cup stakes race at Penn National on Hold the Salt for trainer James Dodgen.  I am looking forward to getting back into a routine of riding primarily at one track.  It's hard to move around a lot.  I feel like I live in a suitcase.  Laurel will run Saturday thru Mondays and then I will ride Delaware Park Tuesday thru Thursdays and some nights at Penn National.  Hope you can keep up.  See you at the races.

There is a lot of pressure that goes on when you are a Jockey.  You are expected to perform at a high level all the time.  As a jockey, we are one of the fittest athletes in the world and have to be tough mentally and physically to control the 1000lb plus thoroughbred horses that we ride and also have to answer to the trainer when we come back after a race and explain why we didn't win.  If we win we look like a genious.  Even if we didn't have a perfect trip and didn't make the right decisions thru out the race, the best horse will over come our mistakes.(sometimes)  Then we can be on a long shot and ride the perfect race and catch all the breaks and get lucky to come in first.  Horses are similiar to people.  They don't always want to go to work or feel well.  When they are having a bad day it will show in there performance of the race.  There is no explaining this to the trainer when the horse doesn't run well.  It's very frustrating when this happens.  Especially when your the favorite and are expected to win.  There are so many ways a race can be lost.  But then on the other side of it, when everything goes right, you get the perfect trip, your horse is at there peak and ready to run there best race it seems you can do no wrong.  It's the most amazing feeling to win a race.  It gives you the most incredible EGO Boost and confidence that you could ever feel.

I just want the public to be aware of how incredibly hard jockeys work and try to win races.  We get a lot of grief from the fans when they bet and lose there money thinking that the jockey didn't try.  Our trade by design is a dangerous one.  Where often the reward(purse money) does not out weigh the risks we take on a daily basis. 

I have such passion for my profession and love learning about each horse I ride.  Feeling the power and energy that they give and the determination they have to win and be the best.  I love meeting the fans after a race and try to give them a glimpse of the excitement and energy that I feel after a win or a good finish by my horse.  Hope to see you at the races soon.