My day started out great winning 3 races at Laurel Park.  Between my agent(Scott Silver) and my boyfriend(Rich Averill) they had lined up everything for me from getting from the train station to the track and then a ride back to Delaware that night.(1am)  Looking at the program this night my horse has a really good chance to win or hit the board.  I love the distance and the race being on the turf so everything is looking good.  I walked out into the paddock to see my horse(Southwest).  Wow he is a gorgeous grey.  I got my instructions and went on to warm him up.  He seemed eager and a bit strong in the post parade but then he settled.  Stood in the gate perfect and had a sharp break.  I let him position himself going into the first turn and that is where my trouble began.  I got shuffled back immediately with no where to go but up heels.  I was steadying and checking for most of the race.  I had so much horse underneath me with no where to go.  It is an awful feeling and incredibly frustrating when you can't find a hole to go thru.  Coming around the last turn a lot of the horses started to slow down even more in front of me.  I am almost last at this point and still trying to manuever my way thru the traffic.  Finally at the 1/4 pole I had to finally just pull my horse out about 5 paths to get clear and then he was able to run.  But at that point it was to late.  I ended up finishing 5th just getting beat for 4th position.  I felt awful about the whole race.  Second guessing whether I should of sent him away from the gate and put him in a closer position or maybe I should of just got out and went wide coming out of the first turn or etc...So many things go thru your mind when something like this happens.  The main thing I finally thought to myself is that the horse pulled up good and I made it around safe.  When I got to the groom and assistant trainer I just told her that I was really sorry.  The race did not set up for us at all.  I got in so much trouble from the start.  She looked very disappointed like she should have but I know that I felt worse about the race.  Races like this happen and I know it.  But it never makes it feel any better.  I just had to pick myself back up and know that tomorrow is another day of racing and more opportunities to win more races.